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[Velma, spoken] My sister, Veronica and I had this double act. And my husband, Charlie, traveled around with us. With the last number in our act, we did 20 acrobatic tricks in a row--one two three four five, splits, spread eagles, flip flops, back flips, one right after the other! Well, this one night we were in Cicero, the three of us, and we were in this hotel room boozing and having a few laughs. And we ran out of ice, so I went out to get some I come back, open the door… There's Veronica and
[Annie, spoken] I met Ezekiel Young from Salt Lake City about two years ago and he told me he was single and we hit it off right away. So, we started living together. He'd go to work, he'd come home, I'd mix him a drink, we'd have dinner Then I found out, single my ass! Not only was he married, well he had six wives; one of them Mormons, you know? So that night, when he came home, I mixed him his drink as usual… You know, some guys just can't hold their arsenic!
[Hunyak, spoken] Mit keresek én itt? Azt mondják, a híres lakóm lefogta a férjem, én meg lecsaptam a fejét. De nem igaz. Én ártatlan vagyok. Nem tudom, miért mondja Uncle Sam, hogy én tettem. Próbáltam a rendőrségen megmagyarázni, de nem értették meg
[Mona, spoken] I loved Alvin Lipschitz He was a real artistic guy, sensitive, a painter. But he was always trying to “find himself”. He'd go out every night looking for himself, and on the way, he found…Ruth, Gladys, Rosemary and Irving. I guess you can say we broke up because of artistic differences. He saw himself as alive And I saw him dead!
[Liz, spoken] You know how people have these little habits that get you down? Like...Bernie! Bernie likes to chew gum--no, not chew. Pop! So, I come home this one day and there's Bernie. Lying' on the couch, chewing--no, not chewing, POPPING! So, I said to him, I said "Bernie, you pop that gum one more time…" And he did. So I took the shotgun off the wall and I fired two warning shots Into his head!
[Hunyak, spoken] Mit keresek én itt? Azt mondják, a híres lakóm lefogta a férjem, én meg lecsaptam a fejét. De nem igaz. Én ártatlan vagyok. Nem tudom, miért mondja Uncle Sam, hogy én tettem. Próbáltam a rendőrségen megmagyarázni, de nem értették meg
[Announcer, spoken] And now, the six married murderesses of the Cook County Jail In their rendition of 'The Cell Block Tango'!
[June, spoken] Now, I'm standing in the kitchen carving up the chicken for dinner, and in storms my husband Wilbur in a jealous rage "You been screwing the milkman!" he said. And he kept saying, "You been screwing the milkman!" Then he ran into my knife. He ran into my knife ten times